Friday, September 03, 2004
Saying sorry is just a way of easing one's guilt
im glad that todae is finally over. but im not lookin forward to e hols. i believe that holidays are supposed to b a break/rest rite? i dun consider studying for finals n 7 chps of chinese a rest. i dun think anione in their rite mind wld.
"under the sea. over the sky". guess hu said this. the one n only ever lame mrs sin. -_-. for iap, our class is singing "under the sea" as e finale. mrs sin was trying to make a joke i guess. but i think it fell flat. wat is so funny abt 'under the sea, over the sky'? lame jokes just make a joke out of that person.
im longing to c e word '[ ]' back on. but i dun think i ever will. even if i do. it's probably a long time frm now. is it worth it? im e only one hu can ans tt quest. but i haf no idea at all. many ppl haf helped me think things thru. but e final decision lies with me. i was asked whether i was giving up. my heart said no. but my brain .. was undecided. sigh. i've been ignored not once. not twice. but many times of late.
sorry doesn cure much. it doesn cure anithing. wat is done n can't b undone. sorry is juz a way of easing e guilt of e person hu said or did smthg wrong. but to e one hu suffers. sorry ain't much. sorry is just a word. i planned to wait fer e boat took take me across e river. cos i dun trust e raft. it's juz too risky. i wld probably b thrown onto e river n fighting fer my life fer another wk b4 sum ship comes along to pick me up. or maybe. i shld juz ferget abt tyring to cross this damned river. seeing another word in replacement of [ ]. juz makes me feel so .. unwanted. yup. tt's e word.
sch today was quite relaxed. i was very heck-care abt e hist CA. barely studied. fine. din study. hehh. recently i've been so buzy. my mind's been clouded wif a lot of stuff too. it's not tt i want studies to take a back seat. it's juz tt it automatically does? hahh. im making excuses aye. sigh.
how many times haf i sighed? i tink it's one time too many. hehh. i'll stop here fer now. update later if i still haf time. this entry is real long. din realise. byee.
3:31 PM
